I tell you what...something is fishy about this new Internet Explorer. Can't quite put my finger on it...but if I were to put my finger on it, then quickly retract the finger and place it beneath my nostrils, I bet it would have a foul, fishy odor. I'd betcha' anything. Well, anything except my "comfortable boxers." I would have no joy if those were taken away from me.
Very briefly, I want to touch on this little guy: 
First of all...what the damn hell is he looking at (looks like the word "if" from here)? Secondly, how come he gets to have fully realized eyes, with pupils et al? If you ask me, the rims of his eyes make him look like he's wearing glasses -- I'm talking "Morpheus-type" glasses...like this "sexy" gentleman right here:
First of all...what the damn hell is he looking at (looks like the word "if" from here)? Secondly, how come he gets to have fully realized eyes, with pupils et al? If you ask me, the rims of his eyes make him look like he's wearing glasses -- I'm talking "Morpheus-type" glasses...like this "sexy" gentleman right here:
And I just can't get behind that. I mean, Mr. Orange-Cool-Guy is supposed to be the only glasses guy. 
Open-Mouth-Looking-Up-Guy just obfuscates the issue, in my opinion. 
Open-Mouth-Looking-Up-Guy just obfuscates the issue, in my opinion. But there's another problem. According to the geniuses over the MySpace Emoticon Department, this guy is "blah," "determined," "dorky," "high," "nerdy," "pensive," "predatory," "stunned," and "whatevah." As opposed to this little chap: 
who is simply (and solely) "devious" (which I believe is a synonym for "on fire"). Personally I think this guy is far more devious: 
Because, dammit, what the hell are you doing in that clam shell? Get the hell out of there! Don't you stick your tongue out at me, you little bastard! Oh really? Really? That's it...I'm sending Mr. Orange Hitman after you now. You will rue the day you climbed into that damn thing, you little smart-ass.
who is simply (and solely) "devious" (which I believe is a synonym for "on fire"). Personally I think this guy is far more devious: Because, dammit, what the hell are you doing in that clam shell? Get the hell out of there! Don't you stick your tongue out at me, you little bastard! Oh really? Really? That's it...I'm sending Mr. Orange Hitman after you now. You will rue the day you climbed into that damn thing, you little smart-ass. But really, I just don't think my boy Jason here 
(because his name is Jason...all right?) is versatile enough to handle that range of emotions. I really don't. How can you be both "stunned" and "determined" at the same time? Or "high" and "nerdy?" That dog don't hunt, if you ask me. And I believe you just did.
(because his name is Jason...all right?) is versatile enough to handle that range of emotions. I really don't. How can you be both "stunned" and "determined" at the same time? Or "high" and "nerdy?" That dog don't hunt, if you ask me. And I believe you just did.So here's my plan of action: Boycot Jason. If I feel my emotions ranging toward "dorky," I will instead veer cunningly over to "exanimate," or 
(because, what the hell does "exanimate" mean?). If I get super-high (perhaps I'm in a plane, or climbing a ladder, or ingesting horse tranquilizers), I'll opt for the breathy indeterminate "numb," or 
. If I'm "stunned," then I'm probably unconsious, and would you please call my cousin Andy to come over with the smelling salts...?
(because, what the hell does "exanimate" mean?). If I get super-high (perhaps I'm in a plane, or climbing a ladder, or ingesting horse tranquilizers), I'll opt for the breathy indeterminate "numb," or . If I'm "stunned," then I'm probably unconsious, and would you please call my cousin Andy to come over with the smelling salts...?
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